Portal movie
So, say a studio buys the film rights to Portal. Then let's say they actually make it. What should they do? Would this be a terrible movie (as most movies based on video games are) or would this really rock? And then would it spawn a sequel, and maybe a third film, regardless of whether Valve had made a third game or not by then? Would they make a Portal 3 to tie into a third movie? Would that be any good or would it be a disaster?
Well, a guide for any filmmakers who are tasked with making a movie of Portal:
1. Use all the voice actors from the game.
2. Use CGI sparingly. Make the sets physical while only CGing elements like portals and GLaDOS. Only do computer-generation when you really have to, otherwise the film would get a really cheesy visual look like the terrible Percy Jackson movies or the well-written and conceived (though plagued by so-so acting and cheesy CGI) Oz movie from earlier this year.
3. Stay true to the game. Obvious, yes, but important. Lots of bad movie adaptations have most of their problems due to spirit and construction not faithful to the source material (again, the Percy Jackson movies).
4. Get actors who are actually good, and have a director and writer who really know what they're doing.
5. Get some additional ideas and elements from Valve's archived concepts. Maybe more derivative movies could come out of that.
Well, you guys are all probably better to judge than me since most of you have actually played the game, and all I've done is window shop for it on YouTube. What do you think?
I'm not sure if the director of that movie had ever actually read a mythology textbook, or if all the plot points were intentionally based off of REALLY obscure references from the Theogony and Metamorphoses. I can find parallels to most of them, but they're probably accidental. 
Anyway, I don't think there will ever be a true Portal movie. There are several short art films on YouTube which are pretty good, but I can't think of a good way to base a whole movie on the games.
If they make a portal movie, it shouldn't be about portals, and they shouldn't call it "Portal".
Answered your own question there. Take a look at this list. Pay attention to the Rotten Tomatoes scores. There is not a single good video game movie in the world (with the exception of a couple of the Pokemon movies, but they were movies of the anime of the game).
Gooooood Luuuuuuuck Wiiiiiiith Thaaaaaaat.
Ellen McLain one cold maybe rope in with the same deal that got one the licences, and people can do really good impressions of J.K. Simmons and Stephen Merchant (we've seen Harry101UK among others do it), but one cannot get all 3 in on a movie project like this.
This is the main problem with a Portal movie. It can't be about the portals. Portals worked in a game because they offered freedom of movement and possibilities for puzzles, neither of which can be conveyed properly in a non-interactive medium. It would therefore be impossible to "stay true to the game" in a movie because Portal and Portal 2 were made to be games. That's part of what makes them so great; they weren't trying to ape another medium. Making a movie from a game removes essential elements from the original product that relied on the interactivity.
I'm going to stab myself under my fingernails for the double post, but this is getting too uncomfortably long for what's next:
Did you know that American English isn't even my first language? It's actually [spoiler]British English[/spoiler]
Released maps of note:
[spoiler]Versatile Diversity
L-Circuts[/spoiler]
Here's a selection of short films that basically serve the same purpose (I'm confident you'll like them.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NorZUFfpvC0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=539oNONcCrI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4drucg1A6Xk
And for a longer video with an interesting take on the concept:
Did you know that American English isn't even my first language? It's actually [spoiler]British English[/spoiler]
Released maps of note:
[spoiler]Versatile Diversity
L-Circuts[/spoiler]
Gooooood Luuuuuuuck Wiiiiiiith Thaaaaaaat.
Ellen McLain one cold maybe rope in with the same deal that got one the licences, and people can do really good impressions of J.K. Simmons and Stephen Merchant (we've seen Harry101UK among others do it), but one cannot get all 3 in on a movie project like this.
If a studio has a enough money to buy the rights to make a Portal movie, they are certainly going to have enough money to hire those voice actors. Voice actors are much much much cheaper than the whole rest of the project, like the CGI team.
I think our best bet for director for a Portal movie would be J.J http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a7mihllgiro
I was actually thinking in terms of difficulty to contact. VALVe themselves didn't have high hopes of getting Stephen Merchant on board, even though Wheatley's script was written for him, and I'm sure Simmons is way too busy being J. Jonah Jameson and that one guy from Legend of Korra to be part of a movie right now (except for the Marc Lawrence/Hugh Grant comedy IMDB says he's doing).
ADDENDUM:
Producer I can see. But director? I'd be concerned that it would turn out like Cloverfield or Super 8: movies that just didn't live up to their expectations past the bits you saw in the trailers and pre-release material.
Did you know that American English isn't even my first language? It's actually [spoiler]British English[/spoiler]
Released maps of note:
[spoiler]Versatile Diversity
L-Circuts[/spoiler]
the actual voice acting only took 1-2 days for wheatly and Cave... it shouldn't be hard to pull them away for a day or two... also they were unsure because it was a video game, and they found that it was super easy to get a hold of them because thats how they make money... I assume the movie plans on paying them.. in which case it shouldn't be a problem.. the directing J.J. does is fine.... what drives a movie is the story... if the story is no good then the movie is.. meh
While that would be excellent (Star Trek 2 and Super 8 are great movies) J.J. Abrams has been commissioned
So I think that more realistic candidates are Tim Burton, or Steven Spielberg. Burton seems better suited to the job though.
While that would be excellent (Star Trek 2 and Super 8 are great movies) J.J. Abrams has been commissioned
So I think that more realistic candidates are Tim Burton, or Steven Spielberg. Burton seems better suited to the job though.
I know J.J. is super busy... I just meant in light of the comments he made in that video.