A long time ago, p0rtalplayer messed up and blew up the dog. It was generally horrific and dramatic how it flew into bits of rotten flesh. However, some Martians just happened to eat said flesh in three words because of the limit we imposed at the start. Somebody noticed the Martians were doing things and called the FBI. They sadly replied that the Martians had died off or hadn't existed since November 1678. A plague from Venus had been transported to Earth by angry space cats (also from Venus)that reproduced fairly quickly. They soon looked for p0rtalplayer so they could bring him to justice for his atrocities and numerous dog explosions. But p0rtalplayer was hiding on Jupiter's Neptune, right below a huge storm cloud. When they found Uranus, the space cats defended p0rtalplayer with their giant pink spacecraft
Well there goes the sense of the story, just a reminder Van, the space cats wanted to kill p0p...
