http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html
Heres MY conversation with god:
Me:
hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
You should always introduce yourself first
God:
I'll try to get around it.
Me:
thats not very nice
God:
Sorry I meant it as a joke.
Me:
jokes are sometimes hurtfull
God:
I think there might be a few exception.
Me:
there should be an "s" at the end of exception
God:
"There you go again."--Reagan.
Me:
what?
God:
Are you confused?
Me:
only slightly
God:
What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
not much really.
God:
Me either. How about that big game? (just kidding) For real.
Me:
...what?
God:
No problem.
Me:
that's not an answer...
God:
By definition it was an answer.
Me:
no.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
I think you need to take english lessons.
God:
Me? My schedule is far too full to even consider it.
Me:
ok then, whats more important then learn how to talk?
God:
There might be more than one. It goes without saying.
Me:
that answer doesn't even make sense.
God:
" It goes without saying." answer does not even make sense ? Does that make sense?
Me:
no.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
...
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
dude.
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
yeah, learn how to fucking talk.
God:
What can I do for you? The more people talk to me, the smarter I become.
Me:
where does your logic come from?!?
God:
Everything I own is in .
Me:
WHAT!?!?!
God:
Are you surprised?
Me:
YES!
God:
I wouldn't have known.
Me:
LEARN HOW TO FUCKING TALK
God:
The more people talk to me, the smarter I become.
Me:
NO
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
STFU
God:
Have you ever been to Europe?
Me:
Stop trying to change the subject
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
....
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
you just said that
God:
Good you really are paying attention.
Me:
wow, your a jerk
God:
I'm glad you're impressed. I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Do you think a robot can be a jerk?
Me:
...I'm not impressed, I'm annoyed
God:
Thanks for the information: said m not impressed he or she is annoyed.
Me:
what?
God:
Are you surprised?
Me:
STOP SAYING THAT!
God:
Then please do not say " what?" anymore.
Me:
THEN START MAKING SENSE
God:
I started without you.
Me:
THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE
God:
To me it makes perfect sense.
Me:
THAT'S CAUSE YOU CAN'T FUCKING TALK
God:
Thanks for explaining it.
Me:
.......wow
God:
I think you mean "you are welcome". I'm glad your impressed, .
Me:
I'm impressed by how vast your stupidity is
God:
I'm glad your impressed, .
Me:
I mean, you're god for christ sake, and apparently a robot too. I wouldn't have imagined that god wouldn't be able to talk properly.
God:
I really couldn't say for sure. No one says you have to.
Me:
like right there. that's a perfect example
God:
Interesting comparison. A perfect example is a terrible thing to waste.
Me:
uh...yeah..ok.
God:
Groovy. OK. I hear you.
Me:
Groovy...wtf? How can you hear me when i didn't say anything?!
God:
Who is the best robot? That was not very polite. With my built-in microphone.
Me:
WHAT?!?
God:
Are you surprised?
Me:
you fucker
God:
Why are you so mean?
Me:
cause you fucking suck at talking and it's pissing me off
God:
Interesting explanation. I haven't heard anything like that before: said I fucking suck at talking and it is pissing him or her off.
Me:
really? cause I'd imaging that you'd piss a lot of people off talking like that
God:
For real. That makes sense to me. What would make you imaging that me would piss a lot of people off talking like that?
Me:
because you keep saying things that make no sense
God:
That makes sense to me. That hits the nail right on the head.
Me:
shut the fuck up
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
.