Possibly the Worst Follow-Up Story for Portal 2 Ever

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Caden
174 Posts
Posted Feb 17, 2013
I found a neat little "book" about what happened after the events of Portal 2- and it is the most horrible thing I have ever laid eyes on in. My. Life. To summarize some of the many "colorful" features that takes place during the story, Atlas and P-Body smoke drugs, GLaDOS attempts to commit suicide, and Chell turns into a zombie (but after being sent to Android Heck turns back into a human because "zombies can't be in android heck").

If you haven't been convinced to look at this wonderful story yet, please read a cut peice from chapter 3:

" *Suddenly without warnin a girl jumped from the whole in the seelin I made when I landed. She was wearin a jumpsuit like me an she looked like me but a little less pretty an hot. I new immediately it was Chell. Chelllooked at me an smiled an started to dance crazy.

"SHAKE IT BAKE IT BOOTY QUAKE IT ROLL IT A ROUND!" Chell sung as her danced an shake butt. Wheetly got sad lookin an told me "I forgot to mention she got brane damage an cant solve tests no more that's why Glaods let her go befour." I cried some tears at my retorded sister shakin her butt all crazy an stuff like on the Sym-Bionical Titan show. I got out a magum pistol an went up to Chell head to shoot an pet her out of her MISERY (which is also a movie). The gun went off like boom boom boom an Chell falled down with blood from her headhole. "Im sorry my sister." Wheetly was cryin an I started cryin to becos it was a really sad day. "*

Convinced yet? Frankly I'd be surprised if you weren't. Here's the link: http://pastebin.com/E8kLy9yh

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BenVlodgi
633 Posts
Posted Feb 17, 2013
Replied 41 minutes later

What did you expect? When you read fanfic you get random weirdos on the internet writing their fantasies out on paper(or in this day and age it would be typing on a kyeboard). I'm sure there is some good fanfic out there, but personally I don't care to read those stories.
I hear this one is good, but I haven't read it myself

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7434133/1/Blue-Sky

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wstrika
200 Posts
Posted Feb 17, 2013
Replied 15 minutes later
That sounds like it was written by a 13-year old.
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Caden
174 Posts
Posted Feb 18, 2013
Replied 58 minutes later

wstrika wrote:
That sounds like it was written by a 13-year old.

I believe it was written by this guy: http://www.moddb.com/members/asbusinessmagnet
Sounds more like the writing of an eight year old to me.

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BenVlodgi
633 Posts
Posted Feb 18, 2013
Replied 18 minutes later

wstrika wrote:
That sounds like it was written by a 13-year old.

Not far off, according to his moddb page he's 16... he's just getting to the age where he thinks smoking is cool, and suicide is a thought at the back of all of their minds.
Teenagers are psychopaths.

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Ace_StorM
75 Posts
Posted Feb 18, 2013
Replied 7 hours later
I wouldn't call all teenagers psychopaths. The people in my class are quite cool and would never write shit like this. That should also have specified my opinion of this nice little extract.
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msleeper
4,095 Posts
Member
Posted Feb 18, 2013
Replied 9 hours later
People who write, read, or care about fan fiction for video games are super weird.
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Caden
174 Posts
Posted Feb 18, 2013
Replied 10 minutes later

Ace_StorM wrote:
I wouldn't call all teenagers psychopaths. The people in my class are quite cool and would never write shit like this. That should also have specified my opinion of this nice little extract.

You really shouldn't put all teenagers under the stereotype of being psychopaths, even though most really are. Point aside, I'm having trouble fathoming that any 16-year old could write something like this! I can see an eight year old- or maybe even a seven-year old (with a really dysfunctional family) writing this, but 16 just seems impossible.

npc_msleeper_boss wrote:
People who write, read, or care about fan fiction for video games are super weird.

Odd, I've never heard about fan-fictions before I found this. But I sure wouldn't be surprised if the founders of fan-fictions were also the founders of the Comicon.

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wstrika
200 Posts
Posted Feb 18, 2013
Replied 1 hour later

Caden wrote:
I sure wouldn't be surprised if the founders of fan-fictions were also the founders of the Comicon.

This is probably the dumbest thing I have ever heard.

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Caden
174 Posts
Posted Feb 18, 2013
Replied 7 minutes later

wstrika wrote:
Caden wrote:

I sure wouldn't be surprised if the founders of fan-fictions were also the founders of the Comicon.

This is probably the dumbest thing I have ever heard.

:roll: I was kidding.

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msleeper
4,095 Posts
Member
Posted Feb 18, 2013
Replied 4 minutes later
I literally had to check to see if you were AlexanderBell posting as a new account.
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Caden
174 Posts
Posted Feb 18, 2013
Replied 8 minutes later

npc_msleeper_boss wrote:
I literally had to check to see if you were AlexanderBell posting as a new account.

That hurts. It sincerely, truly, hurts.

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wstrika
200 Posts
Posted Feb 18, 2013
Replied 29 minutes later

Caden wrote:
npc_msleeper_boss wrote:

I literally had to check to see if you were AlexanderBell posting as a new account.

That hurts. It sincerely, truly, hurts.

That is genuinely hilarious, since anything involving Alexander Bell predates your arrival to these forums by about...3 months and change.

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Gemarakup
1,183 Posts
Posted Feb 19, 2013
Replied 5 hours later
@Caden: How could you say that on people that are probably on the autistic spectrum?
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Ace_StorM
75 Posts
Posted Feb 19, 2013
Replied 11 hours later

Caden wrote:
You really shouldn't put all teenagers under the stereotype of being psychopaths

That's exactly what I wrote.

Ace_StorM wrote:
I wouldn't call all teenagers psychopaths.

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Caden
174 Posts
Posted Feb 19, 2013
Replied 5 hours later

yishbarr wrote:
@Caden: How could you say that on people that are probably on the autistic spectrum?

Is he autistic? I would never have posted that if I knew.

Ace_StorM wrote:
Caden wrote:

You really shouldn't put all teenagers under the stereotype of being psychopaths

That's exactly what I wrote.
Ace_StorM wrote:

I wouldn't call all teenagers psychopaths.

I meant to comment that on what Ben said.

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Gemarakup
1,183 Posts
Posted Feb 20, 2013
Replied 6 hours later
No, I was talking about the first post. I wouldn't expect anyone dysfunctional to write that. It was probably written by a bored person.
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tile
380 Posts
Posted Jul 24, 2013
Replied 5 months later

yishbarr wrote:
No, I was talking about the first post. I wouldn't expect anyone dysfunctional to write that. It was probably written by a bored person.

i know im pretty much painting a bullseye on my shirt here, but i have aspergers syndrome (recently changed to autism spectrum disorder) and i function pretty well most of the time, so no thoughts should even cross anyone's minds about that. just because something is not written very well, doesn't mean that the author automatically has a dis-ability. yishbarr, you are correct.